Wednesday 1 April 2015

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Whatsapp funny status one liners messages

at 14:07

  • If “Plan A” didn't work. Don’t worry; the alphabet has 25 more letters.

  • I had a horribly busy day converting oxygen into carbon dioxide.

  • Dear Samsung, please also start selling jeans that can accommodate your smartphones.

  • You’re beautiful until your Photoshop 30 day trial has gone.

  • I'm pretty sure my prayers go directly to God's spam folder.

  • If you`re texting two people at the same time, you are biTextual.

  • My girlfriend is like my iPad...I don`t have an iPad.

  • The longer the title the less important the job.

  • A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

  • Until I was thirteen I thought my name was 'Shut up'.
  • I am not fat, I am just easier to see.
  • I never make the same mistake twice. Three, four times maybe. But never twice.

  • They say that alcohol kills slowly. So what? Who's in a hurry?

  • When you wait for a waiter in a restaurant, aren't you a waiter?

  • Try to say the letter "M" without your lips touching.

  • Weird is a side effect of awesome.

  • Relationships are a lot like Algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?

  • I heard you took an IQ test and they said your results were negative.

  • I don`t have a bad handwriting, I have my own font.


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